"Happy Holidays"...not for everyone

Years ago I was asked to preach in a church for Mother’s Day. What was normally a time to speak in joyful, upbeat tones I turned into a time of somber remembrance and reflection. I talked about women for whom it was not a “happy” Mother’s Day but recalled there were some women who were childless or others who had lost a child to the heartless grip of premature death. It was probably the most powerful message I have ever delivered. For the women there, someone had shined light of hope and comfort on the burden they had carried for years.

I am doing the same thing to “Happy Holidays.


The “Happy” usually comes not from stuff but from our relationships with people. Now is the time to cherish family and friends. For many, this will not be such a happy time. For they will have an aching emptiness in their hearts. There will be people no longer present at gift openings or family gatherings. They will have lost loved ones through death since this time last year and the heartache is still lingering in the shadows waiting to pounce on them and savage their hearts with ferocity.

Some are experiencing the living death of a loved one who no longer knows them due to Alzheimer’s. Their pain is unique indeed.

It has been eight years since my Mom died with congestive heart failure. This year of all years, I have thought about her more and more. Why? Probably due to physical conditions. My knees ache often and I have harder time getting around than I used to. Now it dawns on me how often I used to see my Mom struggle to rise up off of low sitting furniture or struggle to get her knees warmed up when she walked.

I am humbled when I realize at the most active times of my life, band concerts, football games and Boy Scout events, it was physically challenging for her to attend. I especially think about the long, steep climb to get up the ramp at Pasadena Memorial Football Stadium in Pasadena Texas. She attended countless football games and events there over the years. Then, followed it up with season tickets to A & M football when my brother made and eventually led the Aggie Band as a Drum Major.

She never complained. Why not? Because of “the joy set before her”, that is to see her sons and how they were growing and becoming responsible young men before her very eyes. She carried the burden of being a divorced and single Mom as a badge of honor and opportunity to love and pour her life into the two of us.

I look back and remember times our senior year in high school when my Mom would intentionally seek out our friends to say “Hi” to at band events. I used to wonder why and one day she told me. She knew kids who had not had parents attend ANY events during their high school careers. My Mom felt it her duty, no privilege to acknowledge the presence and price that kids had paid. She found it important that every child receive recognition and a little love for being there. They loved her back because of it.

So, love my life and family as I do, I somehow miss Mom more this year than others.

As you walk about this holiday season, pause and remember those who you have sent sympathy cards to in recent years. Call them or write note in your holiday cards letting them know you remember their loss and are praying for them. A kind word goes a long way.

If you are that person, from me to you, God bless you and may you know Him as your comfort and companion in these difficult days. You are not alone…we care.

Stunner in New Orleans…example for all of us.

I grew up in SE Houston and am very familiar with the “boat People “ who were gratefully transplanted there in the late 70’s. They came with no English skills, no friends but an insatiable desire to maximize freedom.

They believed that public education was a gift form God. Even if they had no homework, they still studied and read a great deal. They soon dominated the tops of the honor rolls throughout the greater Houston area.

They have become so successful they now suffer reverse discrimination where top universities limit the enrollment in their freshmen classes.

Now… the unthinkable has happened in New Orleans. A Viet-American has beat a sitting Congressman in Democratic dominated New Orleans.

Congrats to Joseph Cao for his win over Willie Jefferson. Congressman Cao graduated from high school in NW Houston, got a BS in Physics from Baylor and has made life long learning an ambition of his. It has paid off.

He is well respected in the community where he lives and serves. He is a new role model for conservatives and liberals alike. He strips away excuses for other minorities to say they are being held down. If he and Obama can rise to the top…what’s your excuse?